Helping Survivors Manage

After research and thought, I have decided to sell the book on Amazon. Sales and feedback continue to be promising…as always, any and all feedback is welcome..Peace…

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1616232730

Kat Reed — Begin Here: Helping Survivors Manage

Time: Thursday, February 18, 2010 7:30 p.m.
Location: Common Good Books
165 Western Ave N, Suite 14
St. Paul, MN 55102
651.225.8989
www.commongoodbooks.com

Everyone dies. We realize that this blatant statement is shocking, but it is true. There are countless organizations around the world that offer grief support, but none that provides the product that we offer. Helping Survivors Manage was created on the foundation of most new ventures: a void in the market. We hope to fill that need with our experienced team of subject matter experts (those who have been through it, as well as funeral directors, hospice, health and death care professionals) to help others through this difficult time.

Kat Reed has over 25 years experience in the financial/business world. Her background in bookkeeping and office management gives her the unique ability to address both the details and the big picture. She has been a hospice volunteer and has an affinity for the elderly. She became interested in the issues survivors face when both her parents died in a thirteen month span.

This book arose from Kat’s own work helping her predominantly deaf father manage her mother’s affairs when her mom died. Kat and her dad wondered how people manage all these tasks when they don’t have a family or support system.

The father of a very close friend of mine died several years ago. One item (task) she mentioned was particularly frustrating. At his death, her father had a Certificate of Deposit (aka CD) that she was trying to settle to his estate. The challenge was that his wife was the beneficiary on the CD, and his wife had died ten years prior. It was a difficult process and took years to resolve. Taking the time to remind yourself, your family and those close to you to check to make sure they have updated beneficiaries will help a survivor tremendously in their already arduous responsibilities. A good time to do that is once a year, typically, I think of these things around the first of the year. Peace…

Left, my maternal grandpa and grandma, and mom as a baby; Right, my mom at 11 years old.

When I was little, my grandma always took me to visit her father, my great grandpa, at the assisted living facility (formerly called nursing home). I loved to go with her even though my great grandpa always thought I was my mom. That made me feel good because everyone who knew my mom knows how pretty she was, and I definitely did not feel as pretty as I knew she was. At that time, I doubt Alzheimer’s was diagnosed (maybe it was, and they felt no need to tell me about it).

In retrospect, I find it interesting how my grandma never made me feel sad or bad for anyone who may have had things a littler rougher (by appearances) than others; it is what it is, make the best of it. Fortunately, she died without having to go through much of the mental challenges that sometimes face the elderly. I have many friends who have aging parents and they are encountering the challenges of facing not only their parents’ mortality, but in turn (probably mostly subconsciously) their own.

Here are a few reminders of what aging parents and friends are possibly experiencing:

-Loss of friends and family at a much higher rate than we, causing or increasing depression
-Loss of some faculties, causing embarrassment
-Loss or decline in independence (how would you feel if you were told “you really shouldn’t be driving”?)
-Loss of memory
-Increased ailments
-Loss of mobility, minor or not

For me the biggest challenge that I think I will face when I am (much ) older is the depression. I lived with a woman who was 83 and she told me “all my friends are dying.” I will never forget that. But, as I learned from my grandma, it is what it is, I will make the best of it, and always put myself in others’ shoes and not judge. Compassion above all, we all deserve it and we all need it. Peace…